第四章 遣词造句及修辞手法

一、选词

文章采用什么样的词汇要以文章的内容及读者为转移。

美国许多总统的就职演讲由于选用了简短有力、脍灸人口的词而家喻户晓、流芳百世。如约翰·肯尼迪就职演说词中的名言是：“Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country”，林肯葛底斯堡演说中的“government of the people, by the people, for the people”也深得人们的喜爱。

但研究生入学考试英语写作中应选用什么样的词汇呢？考生是否也能用简短的词汇来表达深邃的思想呢？我们发现学生习作中普遍存在的一个现象是：用的是初中英语课本里的词汇；表达的是小学三年级孩子的思想。可见， 对英语未能熟练掌握的英语学习者，要想用简短的词去表达较深的思想，是很难的。

其实，许多简短的词意思都较抽象、笼统，而那些大、长词的表达却更具体、明确并能难人以深刻的印象。请看下面几类词：

bad children:rude, selfish, ungrateful hot-tempered;

bad meat:tough, overcooked, contaminated

good men:kind, honest, generous, sympathetic, warmhearted selfless honorable

good food:tasty, nourishing, wholesome, high-priced, substantial 初稿：

1. My friend Ariadne is very interesting. (2)She carries herself like the heroine she is named after, even though she's only a five-good one.(3) Another thing she does is to choose clothes that flatters her. (4) Her colthes aren't always new, but uses colors and lines in a way that immediately catches your eyes. (5) She is a good cook and has seven brothers. (6) Her glasses make her a look of cleverness and confidence. (7) When she is closer you can see her vivid, deep blue eyes. (8) They look nice with her light blond hairs. (9) She's 30 years, but you'd never know it, by looking at herself. (10) She seems ageless.

修改后：

(1) My friend Ariadne is as striking as her name. (2) She knows that the riginal Airadne was a heroine in a Greek myth, and she carries herself like a heroine even though she's only five foot one. (3) But her posture is not the only thing that catches your eyes. (4) Her skillful use of jewelry, scarves and the way she blends the colors and lines of her clothes make her stand out in any any group of people. (5) It doesn't matter that her clothes aren't always in the current fashion. (6) They are right for her. (7)Even glasses look good on her ; they give her a look of intelligence and self-confidence. (8)Up closer, you can see her vivid, deep blue eyes that contrast strikingly with her light blond

hair. (9) The effect of all these features is to make her seem as ageless as the myth that she is named after.

仔细阅读、比较上面两篇短文后，我们发现修改稿不仅换上了能够统率全文、使全文浑然一体的主题句：My friend Ariadneis as striking as her name, 而且，加用了连贯词 and, but 等，使文章结构和意思都更紧奏。这里， 值得注意的是许多简短的词都换成了大、难或长的词。如：第一句中的 very 换成了一个比较结构“as⋯⋯as”，这更能反映习作者驾驭语言的能力。第 4 句的“make her stand out in any group of people”换下“striking” 因而使表达多样化。另外，修改后的短文通过用“blends”代替“new”以及“contrasts strikingly”取代“looks nice”，使短文的表达更加具体、贴切。

**二、另外，选词时要避免使用罗嗦、累赘的词。**请看下面几个例子：

（不简洁）Their solution to the problem of overpopulation at first sounded like a strange solution.

（改正）Their solution to the problem of overpopulation at first sounded strange.

（不简洁）In 1975 the stealers beat the Virkings; in 1976 the steelers beat the Cowboys.

（简洁）In 1975 the steelers beat the Virkings; in 1976, the Cowboys.

（分号的使用表示省略了相同的主谓语。）

（同义重复）Julia delights in giving parties; entertaining guests is a real pleasure.

（简洁）Julia delights in giving parties.